Swimming upstream? About to hit the next level in your life? Almost done your project?
Well, darlin’ prepare for the breakdown before the breakthrough—- it’s a rite of passage every person must face to develop themselves or improve their life.
The bigger the change you want, the bigger the potential breakdown.
Often, this happens right before you reach success, so you have to keep the faith, and keep pursuing that dream anyway.
Or maybe it’s not a breakdown before the breakthrough, but instead a breakthrough before the break down. Even smaller improvements–an amazing day, a new success–can be immediately followed by a breakdown.
Think about the last time you “upleveled” your life. Did you get praise, reach a goal, have a great date, receive important news, and then immediately after your happy moment, find yourself down in the dumps? Did some other area of your life collapse?
Do you remember experiencing a breakdown before a breakthrough? These are usually a little more difficult to remember because they are overshadowed by the positive moments, but keep the question out there and it may come to you.
Noticing this pattern–the tug and pull of life—will empower you to have faith in yourself and your ability to create improvements like happiness and peace. When our dreams don’t match reality, we need to keep high morale.
I think we’d all like more happiness and joy, more love and success, and perhaps even a little more $? Yes I bet you wouldn’t say no to a few more good things. But your unconscious might.
We all have what Gay Hendrix calls the “Upper Limit Problem.” In his book The Big Leap, he describes how we all have an inner thermastat–a certain tolerance for goodness in our lives. When we cross the threshold into unknown territory (basically more overall awesomeness) scale tips too far. This alerts our subconscious mind that something is out of the typical equilibrium and inevitably we are drawn to find something to be upset about– petty fights with loved ones, an accident, a tech crisis, old heartache, or something else.
Sure feelings come up, but we never have to be devastated by things that happen in our lives. Whether or not it really is a big deal, we can still choose not to become fully emotionally invested. We could always be grateful for what we have and do our best to make the most of the situation. This allows us to hold on to the positive aspects of our experience.
If you find yourself experiencing your Upper Limit or going through a breakdown, ask yourself what you were feeling before the breakdown happened. Try to get back in touch with that and back on track.
Something that is absolutely necessary when coming across a breakdown, whenever it happens is to pause and breath. Then:
1. Do not blame yourself or call yourself weak, etc. This is all a part of the process of growing! Congrats, you are on to something. Try saying this to yourself, “Of course I feel this way. I make sense.”
2. Get space to relax, take care of yourself and process. You could meditate, journal, talk to a coach or friend, get a massage or whatever works for you.
3. Pat yourself on the back for continuing to seek improvements. Find something to celebrate and decide to see the glass as half full rather than half empty.
4. Remind yourself of your big why– why are you doing what you are doing? What are you building? Is what you were seeking still relevant? What lays before you on the path to your goals or desired experiences? Organize your todos, and decide what manageable bite you will tackle and what you will enlist others to help you with….tomorrow.. because today you need a break!
Good luck
xx Sofia Wren
I help sensitive, caring individuals who have a different perspective of the world to overcome their struggles with uncertainty and fear.
I help them express their unique perspective and personal journey so they may be a better, more confident version of themselves.
Whether you are an entrepreneur, a writer, or artist, if you’d like to overcome fear of your true purpose, and feel safe expressing yourself, so that you can help more people in the world and better your life–
Request a free 15 minute Down to Paper Session to gain clarity on what you are here to write or create for your book, business or other project
