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I feel weird about threads

As a business owner or creator do you feel like this is just one more place you have to produce content? Another source of distraction?

Mm yeah kind of feeling weird about it myself.

I made this spontaneous video with EFT Tapping video to help cut through the noise, chaos and FOMO and to help you navigate in whatever way is best for you.

I will admit, I have come to enjoy using threads–but for me any new social media activity is a really slippery slope as I tend towards addiction.

(My username is Sofia.wren there.)

But if I can use it a little tiny bit and use it for connection or to talk about things I love, like writing, then I guess it’s ok.

Watch here to join me in the battle to find a balance with the ever growing array of social media platforms!

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Behind the Scenes of Personal Vlog Storytelling

Show and tell time

One of my summer projects is a personal vlog (video blog).

I made my first vlog a year ago on Life After Loss and have been playing with what will be in episode 2 ever since.

I never thought it would take me this long to make my second vlog, after the first one went so well.

Lots of positive comments. And it was healing for me.

But that’s just been the way it has been. Some stories take time to tell

Here’s a behind the scenes of what that process looks like.

The first stage of my process this time has been:

  • Taking videos of beautiful places when I see them to include as footage.
  • Writing the story I might tell in the video. I will use this to eventually record the voice over.
  • Rewriting that story until it feels done or important to say in a lasting way.

I’ve been doing this ever since my first vlog came out.

Things are feeling a little bit more solid now, in terms of what story I want to put in the VLOG, so I’m in a new stage now.

Second stage:

Then I started picking out some music that I think will go well with the mood.

Third Stage

This time, I also have been writing a list of additional scenes that I want to film.

These scenes illustrate certain things I want to say.

I even arranged some of these ideas into a “Plot line” which is a visual representation of the emotional arch of the story.

I’m still working on the content, but here is a peak…

Here’s a clip of some writing that may make it into the vlog (we will see):

“My artform is my being me, which means I express sadness or pain sometimes. This is not a sign that I need advice, fixing or that I am not ok. This is me expressing a good feeling: a feeling that it is safe. I no longer have to contort or fix myself.

My emotions do not need to be perfect. I accept it all. I am safe expressing sadness or pain and I inspire others when I am open, because whatever I feel others are feeling it, too.

I share from self-love, conviction that I care, that I hear myself. I can let it go with my words because holding on or pretending like none of it existed, long story short, IS NOT FOR ME.

My words describe me but also the past me, too, because it turns me into someone new whenever I express.”

Stay tuned as I keep working on my second vlog.

It is not ready yet.

I will keep you posted how the rest of the process goes!

Make sure to get my email updates if you want to hear more

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I can’t believe it took me so long to realize this

It has taken me years to really understand that rushing is not the way forward.

Overcoming instant gratification to tell better stories has been a game changer.

I have written and published 28 articles in 2023 alone, so this may surprise you,

but believe it or not,

this commitment to taking my time to tell my stories is still something I live by!

Enjoy the article here.

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Broken Websites & Our Common Humanity

Today I woke up way too early.

4:00 am. Ish.

Laid in bed trying to go back to sleep.

Got up at 5:54 and started trying to fix my website.

Is that crazy? Sounds psycho when I type it out…

Oh well, it’s the truth.

The Website Bio Refresh Party I hosted last Friday was great but

most people (including me) had tech difficulties and couldn’t edit their site at all!

Gah!

We got a lot of brainstorming, writing, and prep work done,

so it wasn’t a waste of time at all,

but that definitely lit a fire under me to fix my website.

Well, the good news is that this morning,

I figured HOW to fix my main website,

this site you are looking at right now.​

(It was an anti-spam plugin causing the trouble.)

An image of sofiawren.com
My website looks pretty again. Yay (trying to get excited about this).

But here is the bad news,

before I even got a chance to finish my project,

i.e. edit the bio on my website sofiawren.com


HOUSTON, we have a problem.

I realized that my other, older site that I created in 2012

for my massage therapy business

was broken and wouldn’t even load.

I sighed deeply. I told myself it was okay.

I’m not a massage therapist anymore anyway for reasons.

But I did a quick fix.

A redirect.

Now anyone who visits over there will just get redirected automatically to HERE.

But the completionist in me is still grumbling that it’s not enough.

I still really want that busted site to get fixed for real at some point.

UGH!

So I fixed a problem…and then discovered I had another.

YOU KNOW THAT’S LIFE I GUESS.

I guess the site that actually matters to me right now works….so it’s a win.

Trying to muster up some enthusiasm about that

but it’s not coming. Maybe I’m too tired.

It just feels WEIRD and unsatisfying.

Anyway I am sharing because I maintain that

being dissatisfied with your website is a part of the human condition.

(Unless you don’t have a website and don’t want one…

If so, then you can put your feet up and relax!)

After 20+ years of having my own sites and

10 years of talking to entrepreneurs and writers, I have found that

the people who are happy with their website/web presence are the exception, not the rule.

Some people don’t have a site but DO want one, so they are dissatisfied with not having one.

Most people with a site could bend your ear with some groans about the state of it.

There’s always another thing you could do with it.

There’s ALWAYS some weird hanging-chad type of feeling.

Do you know what I am talking about?!

And achieving perfection is either

complicated,

a hassle, or

not a priority

which is why it gathers dust.

I get that, and that could be perfectly fine,

but every so often you just want your site to work and make you feel good.

You just want to share it and have it be pretty and shiny.

AND sometimes a totally busted site (like mine) comes

because you never really deal with the problem for a very long time…

And maybe at that point, it’s a message to say,

“Girl, maybe it’s time to scrap that old site you’ve outgrown and just start fresh?”

I dunno about you but that’s what’s running through my mind right now.

Anyway, long story short:

If you’re feeling a lack of satisfaction around your website, I hear you!!!!

And if you don’t care about your site or having a site at all, that’s cool.

But if you do care about starting a site or changing your site this summer,

so that the words and images really express you & attract clients

or you want to start or spice up a different writing project right now…

I’m happy to help!

Check out my NEW Summer Special below.

And that’s all my tired brain has for you today

MWAH xo

SPICE UP YOUR WRITING

with the Summer Special

​For help writing:

website bios, service descriptions, blogs, emails, nonfiction books, and more.

Live zoom or phone writing support starting at $69

People will love your writing! ​

Details here 

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Seeing a Vision that Others Don’t See

Seeing a vision that others don’t see can be such a challenge.

If you ever feel that way, I hope you enjoy this article on the topic.

Your perspective is needed! But there are some things you need to know to lead others.

Read here in the Writing as Transformational Leadership series.

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Update on Her Future Foundation

Great news:

To everyone who supported Her Future Foundation, the nonprofit to end FGM and human rights abuse for girls in Sierra Leone,

the organization is receiving outside grants for the first time since 2021!

And it’s thanks to our donations that they can receive the funds.

HUGE THANKS to everyone who supported both this year and last year as it has made a very real difference.

Here’s an update about that campaign, the nonprofit, and how it is going.

And yes! You can still donate.

Read the update here

​https://www.givengain.com/ap/sofia-wren-raising-funds-for-her-future-foundation-59724/

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Take your site from “funky” to fresh + spicy

Are you a coach or small business owner looking to connect with your audience and attract more clients or followers?

Introducing the Website Bio Refresh Party – a fun way to update your website bio and make it relevant, current and spicy!

Key points of the 60-90 minute class:

🌶 how to go through my unique step-by-step process to update your website bio so it hooks the people who need you and they shower you with love.

​🌶 why the goal of a bio is not about looking perfect but something much simpler yet effective

​🌶 what parts of my website bio I think are strong versus weak/embarrassing/outdated at this point (can you relate?) due to evolving I’ve done more recently.

🌶 what things matter the most to change asap and why.

With the Website Bio Refresh Party, you’ll take big steps forward to feel good about your website and bio, and be motivated to share it with the world. This means more clients, more opportunities, and more success for your business.

Don’t miss out on this fun opportunity to refresh your bio and attract your ideal clients, fans and followers.

Join the Website Bio Refresh Party now and take the first step towards a successful online presence.

How it works:

After signing up, in the next 1-2 business days, you’ll receive zoom information to see the replay.

Sign up here for only $36

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What about what YOU want?

you matter

Hope you are having a good day.

This week has been a mix of ups and downs. Father’s day was tough for me as I grieve my dad super hard. But I also got to enjoy a water park (my very first!) on a beautiful, warm Juneteenth with my cute husband.

This week I heard my friend Jacqui Acree say something POWERFUL about June and this unique time of year.

I wanted to share it with you today.

Here’s the thing about JUNE

according to my friend Jacqui Acree:

(I grabbed this from what she said in class 3 of the Feel Good Goals series)

“June is the new January. It’s what I was seeing and also experiencing for myself for a few years. Noticing this pattern of false urgency out there that like, “We’re halfway through the year. How are you doing on your goals?”

“And this message that somehow we’re supposed to be halfway there as though life is linear and life is static and it’s neither!

“When summer comes what tends to happen is even though we feel this false urgency, we either want to take a bit of a break or run at a different pace, which is totally legit, if you want to do it.

“Sometimes parenting responsibilities change or you might live in an area where you get a lot of guests. My husband is a teacher so his vacation time is like forced into the school holiday time,

“so there could be all sorts of reasons why you want to take a break, but regardless, it’s hard for it to happen without feeling guilty.

“Guilty and a little bit of angst and like anxiety that, “Oh, what’s not getting done” and feeding that story of like, “Oh, I’m not going to get there this year. This is not going to be my year after all. This is just a repeat of the same story every year.”

“And then September hits, and now you only have a few months left until the year is over. And a lot of people at that point are like, “Just screw it. I guess I’ll wait till the next year,”

“and then the next year happens in January and that messaging is gonna hit you again like New Year New Me, but it never quite is.”

​​

-Jacqui Acree

This quote really resonates with me

​Recently I shared a mid year review about my personal goals, and I feel like you can probably tell I have been under a lot of time pressure and overload.

One of the best things that has come out of this year is a commitment to focus on my relationship with my self first and to not make the most important thing an external goal.

If you’d like to watch my video talking about it, here it is!

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You get to choose what’s most important

Picture of Sofia Wren on youtube

Yesterday I made a video about my personal goals.

The things I chose for myself, not other people or for work.

I shed a few tears sharing about how things have been because I got very REAL.

I felt self-conscious afterwards but I think letting my guard down more is good for me.

I hope being real is contagious and my sharing makes you feel like you can be more yourself.

I never want to be one of those people telling you what to do against your own inner urges,

if anything I say or write doesn’t resonate with you, please toss it.

I truly want to see more REAL humans in the world, more of you and who you really are.

My big point is: don’t let society or other people dictate your priorities, even me.

​Here is a clip of what I shared in my video:​

My dad died two years ago, and it really put my entire life upside down. He’s my only parent and I became responsible for his estate. And it just really changed my life a lot.

It changed my priorities a lot and changed what I had tolerance for, and what I had energy for and motivation for completely, because a lot of the things that I had juice for before, I didn’t anymore,

or I was like why? this is actually not that important.

So it was really important for me to feel like I had a clarity of purpose for the year 2023 and what I was going to do, because that really helps me to know that I’m on track.

And I really feel better when I feel like I’m on track.

But the key is to make sure that my goal is one that is really going to be a productive one, by my own standards. And not just what society tells us to prioritize.

To repeat, I had to find the goal I truly wanted to pursue from my own desire, and not just what other people want me to prioritize.

If your goals stress you out or you feel pressured to achieve things that don’t make you happy, I highly recommend a free series called Feel Good Goals.

I have been raving about this instructor because she’s really helped me be more self-loving as I work to listen to myself better this year (my ultimate goal).

All the REPLAYS are available until June 21st

​Sign up for free here

{This post contains affiliate links}

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The real dealio: work, life, writing

Last week I emailed out a review of my personal writing goals + what helped and I said I would email you about my “work” writing goals this week.

But then something happened…

earlier in the spring I fell while ice skating. I put my arm out to catch myself and you really should not do that actually, sooooooo I hurt myself.

It took a while for me to realize it wasn’t healing, and then it took forever to get a referral and an appointment with a specialist, which I finally did on Tuesday.

It really woke me up to how I need to rest my arm more, which is hard since it’s my dominant hand, and I run a business and am a professional writer…all of which means a lot of using my hand.

It’s just one more reason to forgive myself for any lack of ‘perfection’ in what you see me writing or doing, including what you see me NOT do.

So I’m not really going into how my writing went professionally in as much detail this week as I did with my personal goals last week, or at least it will not be as polished.

Let’s be HONEST, my priority this year is on me as a person anyway so it doesn’t give me as much juice to write about the work side.

But now I’m having fun writing this email and my wrist is ok at the moment so I’ll share a bit, why not.

In the last 6 months I:

-wrote 26 articles on Medium, Linkedin, and for On Purpose Women

-taught about how to make writing emails fun at the Vibrant Entrepreneur Conference

-appeared live on camera several times for a Writer Spotlight for On Purpose Women

But I will say that for Medium, I have learned to stop writing as much. LOL

I wrote 17 articles for Medium in 6 months.

My goal in December was to write one article a week, and I realized after a couple months that it wasn’t making me happy so I slowed down.

Instead of focusing on quantity, I focused on being a little more strategic with my topics, article headlines and what publication I was submitting each piece to.

I also was inspired by Becca Syme who spoke about vertical integration in a youtube video; it is the idea of generating many pieces of content in a similar topic, like a ladder people can follow back and enjoy.

I pay attention to what I LIKE writing about, and what people seem to like reading on Medium and go from there.

Right now I have two lines of content I have been building out on Medium:

  1. Stories about Japan, meeting my husband there, our love story, the culture, etc.
  2. Articles about Writing

​Medium pays money as I said in this story

Last month, although I only wrote 2 articles on Medium, I ended up making the most money for the month since December. This is compared to months where I wrote 5,4,3 articles.

It was under $4 total for my highest grossing month in May but it is still cool

Cool that I have been learning to work less and earn more, and my previously written articles are still in rotation and being read.

That shows me how they are strong and cover an enduring topic people will want to read for some time to come.

One story leads to the older ones on a similar subject so people can keep reading if they want to and I get paid for all of that even though the older articles are already done.

I know from writing a book and publishing it, that $4 is comparable to what I would make for a single book sale, possibly more. And instead, all I wrote were a few articles.

So yay!

I went from zero followers on Medium to 377 followers since December also, so that’s cool. More friends.

I do enjoy the chat and conversation in comments on Medium which is one of the reasons I originally decided to write there (as I say in this article). 

Want to read me on Medium?

My profile is here: https://medium.com/@sofia.wren

The articles I link above are all via friend link for your viewing pleasure.

Note if you are not a Medium member you won’t be able to read all my stories but you can look throught the previous posts on this blog to find friend links for each article that will let you read for free.

Or just become a member! Use my link to throw me a few cents: https://medium.com/@sofia.wren/membership

And a final word on Linkedin + my new newsletter there

I was entirely in the dark about Linkedin being a cool place to be,

but when I was teaching about how to have fun emailing this spring,

I talked to someone who had a good experience having a Newsletter there.

So I decided to give starting a Linkedin Newsletter a try, specifically for articles about writing as leadership and topics related to that.

So far I have 50 subscribers, and everyone subscribed instantly gets my new articles emailed to them.

That’s pretty cool considering I didn’t think it took much effort to grow that subscriber list at all.

I recommend it for other people to try. I recommend Medium, too, they just have differences.

You can check out my biweekly Linkedin newsletter “Writing to Lead and Transform” here.

And of course,

​be sure to add me as a connection on Linkedin!

Lastly, I have two helpful resources for you.

You may know I have complex PTSD from a fraught childhood AND grieving my last parent, my dad, but I have still been fighting.

I have been in the fray fighting for the girls in Sierra Leone to get funding through Her Future Foundation, running my own business, trying to get my health together, and a million other things that are triggering or annoying or hard.

I do that because I have the burning desire to keep crawling forward but also because I use tools to help me get into a better place.

1. My free class is still up

My writing lately has been very influenced by an exercise I have done many times this spring.

It helps me to understand what I am really here to do, what I need to say, what my purpose is, and helps me to keep going even though things are hard.

This first tool is in the free class I created with the exercise that has helped me reconnect to the change I am here to make in the world.

The exercise is one I put into a free class.

I said it expired Tuesday….

but I haven’t gotten around to taking it down

so feel free to watch it until I get around to removing it maybe tomorrow or whenever I have the juice to do so!

Read more about that free class on the blog here.

2. Jacqui Acree’s free tapping/EFT class series

I mentioned this and how much it has helped me personally in my review last week.

I have been using EFT/Tapping for many years to work through difficult emotions. It’s a tool where you tap acupressure points.

Jacqui Acree has really taken this practice to a new level, and she is offering a class series for free.

Here’s what I got out of her work:


– I’m feeling much more ENOUGH.

– I’m feeling more self-forgiveness about the limits of my abilities.

– I’m feeling more self-trust to do business and life *my way.*

– I’m feeling more realistic about what I can put on my plate so I don’t stress about what I can’t do.

The increase in self-compassion is gold AND

I am getting emotionally difficult things done as well.


Her work has helped me across the levels of personal and professional and I highly recommend.

The event is free and there are 3 classes. They are available through June 21st.

Sign up for free here

​​

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