I know everyone wants to live according to affirmations, but life is a both/and process. Life is about living and being well even if it’s shit and you don’t feel well. You can be okay with the fact that you are not okay.
The affirmation police have corrected me many times.
I used to write affirmations and post them daily.
At a certain point, I realized as a writer that this format was incredibly limiting if that was the only sentence I was allowed to compose for years and years.
Since then I often post things with the word ‘no’ or ‘not’ in them.
That’s when the affirmation police have instructed me that it is better for manifesting to keep it positive.
I know ya’ll are 100% coming from a good place, but it’s not like I haven’t heard of manifesting before.
I spent $10k and year out of my life getting a coaching certificate in Abraham Hicks.
I was sure it would mean my life was instantly going to be amazing.
Yes, it was cute. No, it did not instantly solve *any* of my problems, especially the money piece.
IT WAS NOT EVERYTHING.
The problem with the mainstream philosophy around manifesting today is that some people have become so beaten over the head with it that it immediately triggers a lack of creativity,
a need to be right versus wrong and a not-enoughness.
It says, “you are doing this wrong, be more positive, if you don’t have something it’s because you are to blame.”
That sounds like emotional abuse to me.
The truth is that we as individuals are not fully in control of everything on this entire planet. Expecting anyone to be all-powerful is too much! Stop putting it all on yourself.
We do have some control though, I’ll say that. We are not powerless. We can create all kinds of wonderful and beautiful things.
But here’s the sticking point here: you aren’t going to feel powerful if you try to control something that you can’t. I’ve written the book on this, literally.
You also are not going to feel powerful if you deny yourself the freedom to be your wild, chaotic, untangled being.
To accept everything you feel and think without judgement, without constant correction to be positive, without endless rules with zero exceptions to come back to the positive.
I am trying to empower you to see the difference between toxic positivity and empowered creativity.
Life is BOTH AND.
Know what your NOs are, as well as your YESes.
The truth is there are a lot of spiritual people out there without a good sense of what their deal breakers are so they end up with toxic relationships, toxic clients, etc.
You can decide to say no for whatever reason—come on, let’s be the change and respect that. Nos are seriously under-loved.
Stop thinking there is only one way to dream—in the positive.
Embrace BOTH AND
And beyond YES and No there is a whole rainbow of possibility.
THAT’S WHAT CREATING IS ABOUT.
It’s about pulling from the vast rainbow and deciding what colors you want to paint with. There are multiple choices, and it is not about the right answers.
How can you be creative if there are two choices to life—scarcity and abundance—and only one of them is right?
You can’t. There has to be more to life than that. There have to be other options.
Yes, there is enormous value on being clear on what you want and focusing on that and moving towards that—but if you don’t have a clear empowered NO, then you will be derailed a gazillion times on things that are out of alignment with what you are reaching for.
Trust me, you will do it, because you are so focused on being chill and positive.
BALANCE IT OUT.
Think about it.
And be like a skittle, be the rainbow. All of it
Want more create inspiration to make progress being ALL of yourself across your writing, creating, and business?
Keep an eye out for the online group program Psychic Mermaid Creatrix opening soon!
Sofia offers coaching for a wide range of budgets, contact her here to see how she can help you write or create, or make faster progress on your book or business from a place of authenticity and flow.
I just returned from an amazing trip in sunny Florida, and am integrating back into my life here in Madison, Wisconsin. It is magically 50 degrees F, instead of it’s usual 20 or below…
Spring is here!! yay!! Only a year ago I was in Japan for Spring (seeing above).
Here’s some writing that I may include in my upcoming book:
Japan Year: how I met my fiance and found my creative soul in Japan.
I was thinking this morning that I live a wildly different lifestyle than the people I grew up with do. Some of the “trappings” may be the same but I am trailblazing an entirely different way of being.
It began with feeling that pressure to fit a certain box—but now I love all the things I am able to create on my own. It is amazing that my focus and intention has crafted my life the way that it has.
There is always time for what I feel compelled to do for my enjoyment, my health, my flourishing—this is no longer bonus to me.
There is always a way. I believe this and so it becomes a priority for me, not an afterthought.
I often have so many ideas for things, it is ridiculous. But now so many have come to fruition—a book, a professionally recorded song, things have popped in my business.
I am the boss.
I set the deadlines.
I never have to worry about being unable to share something with the world because of timing.
I literally am in charge.
And at one point this didn’t matter for my happiness at all—
I was my own boss and at first I was the worst boss I have ever had. My lack of progress bummed me out. I worked 50+ hours for less than minimum wages, for years.
I managed to find a way out of that mindset and embrace “enough ness.”
Now each day, I feel content with what I’ve gotten done and I am excited to be able to work on it some more another time… and yet it still ends up happening in the end, I can trust myself not to let something simmer for too, too long.
But it did not begin with any kind of ease, I had to work at it over time.
Every since I was a teen, I never really felt like I fit, and I waited, and waited for something to change, for an outside force of validation to deliver unconditional appreciation to me, if only I worked hard enough.
To finally be enough, to have done enough, to have arrived.
But now I see that when I decided to craft a life that ended up fitting me, that’s when things changed. All the hard work isn’t what really did it.
I had to completely innovate, including how I thought on a basic level. That required me to tap into the soul of things on a deeper level that isn’t anything I learned fully from someone else. I found my own way.
I did this life-crafting from a place of integrity and originality because I realized that mere copying someone else was not going to work for me—
I don’t know exactly why not but the why does not matter. It didn’t work. I was consistently frustrated.
I was overwhelmed, depressed, anxious. I was uninspired, sad and small.
I did not fit because my life didn’t fit me.
Until I decided to do something about it.
Thankfully I’m the kind of person who collects tools and helpful practices to keep getting clear on what I feel, what I need, and pursue that. Bit by bit these things all pieced together. My life was constantly improving up to until that point, like roots growing under the surface.
But at a certain point I was tired of small variations on the same life. I turned 30 and my dad had a heart attack. It suddenly struck me how short life can be and I had to make a far greater change.
Thankfully, I had the inner resources and the supports in place to be courageous.
I pulled the plug on my life entirely. Left a 7 year relationship. Left a home I was in for 4 years. Left the slow plodding building of my business of 7 years, as well
Seeking a life change, I came up with the idea of teaching English in Japan for a year: a year that would change the direction of my life completely.
I would be restarting clean. I shucked so many possessions. I wrapped up a number of things to prepare for 2 years.
My business had been peaking and I knew it would suffer from a full time job in Japan, but the mermaid in me knew I had to go.
During that time I knew it would all change and I knew it wouldn’t be totally comfortable since I’d lived abroad before.
I’d experience facing those uncomfortable realities when you don’t speak another language fluently: the isolation, the weird vibes, the loneliness. But it was still a change that my heart called for it.
So it might have seemed crazy but luckily I had everything I needed to do it: I was organized and had a system of productivity to keep track of the million or tasks and application items I needed. I kept doing what I needed to get a job and visa in Japan, move my stuff, downsize, get everything I needed etc.
I had money coming in from work that I enjoyed but I also wasn’t so attached to it that I feared losing it. I’d rebuild my business after Japan.
I had an enterprising spirit where I could work as long or as little as I needed anywhere in the world. My business was able to supplement everything else I was doing for money to create some big chunks of cash to pay for moving across the planet.
I did everything myself except for my friends helping me move and rented me a room, and my dad’s help with mail, stuff storage, and giving me a place to stay for a few months.
That time with my dad ended up being precious—a way for us to bond that we hadn’t had in years. He passed away after I returned from Japan, but despite the distance we were closer to ever. My trip gave us the urgency to make good use of our time together, and I’m so glad we used it to the fullest.
I learned a lot about myself as I focused on having the best experience in the “waiting room” before Japan. I dated a ton, with no expectation of finding something that would stick, which taught me more about myself and other people than ever.
It was the most independent thing I have ever done.
It was the most ME thing I have ever done.
I had always wanted to travel and yet it was expensive and there were a million ways to stick to my side of the ocean and try to be practical and wait until XYZ until I could travel.
Well, I stopped waiting. I made it happen.
During that time I had emotional ups and downs, I had crises, I had car crashes, I had broken hearts, I had devastation and disappointments, but at the end of the day it completely changed my life.
I was a changed person from this experience.
I gained something key by the time I went through this whole Japan journey almost to its conclusion.
I met a wall and realized in Japan that there was no more waiting on fully pushing the gas on the creative career I wanted to have—
doing MY art, and not just writing for my clients. Not just trying to be popular, famous or successful.
Doing it to breath AIR and not drown. A huge gulp.
In the year after that realization, I wrote several books, published one, professionally recorded a song, and launched a highend course on creative progress called Mermaid Creatrix. I was on fire.
In Japan I also met my fiancé, too! We met as I was focusing on my music singing at open mics, became friends as I sought out more beautiful experiences in Japan, until dating him became one of those experiences my deep connection to myself led me have.
And in the end, when it was time to return to America, I knew what we had was the relationship that would be worth a fight. More on what I had to do to reunite with my fiance six months later here.
Sometimes the pieces just all come together and click and I finally figured it out through my Japan experience. It was still up and down, but I never had had the balance of factors before to finish and publish my book Freedom Year after 8 years, as well as record New Dawn, my song, after singing and song writing for almost the same amount of time.
I broke through.
And now it’s my passion to share this knowledge so other people can create the lives, books, businesses and other projects that truly light them up.
You have what you need inside of you, the key is to turn the dial to the mermaid station.
Listening to yourself can mean a lot of things. That’s why I say the mermaid station:
listen to the calling of your mermaid, the part of you with the right messages for you to make the best decisions of your life—the things you will look back on and be proud of, knowing you did the right thing and you are on track on a life full of fun and sparkles
In the next few months I will be sharing more clips about my journey in Japan, and, as always, more about intuition, making progress sharing your soul and advancing your unique creative process.
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Want to tap into your inner mermaid so you know what do next?
Keep an eye out for my live online group program Psychic Mermaid Creatrix with everything you need to always know what to do next to make the right decision for your books, creative projects, business, and life.
The live group program will start up again in June.
Stay tuned for some with special bonuses coming for those that pre-enroll in May!
Can’t wait? Gotta have more clarity and mermaid vibes right now?
If you want to always know what to do next to make progress on your project, so you can share your story or get more clients for the work you are passionate about, here is what you can do now:
The homestudy course for Psychic Mermaid Creatrix is open, and if you sign up now you’ll access the full video course and be signed up for the live group in June-August.
I also offer coaching for a range of budgets from $111/month to the $5000 Your mermaid treasure VIP program. I have one spot open right now for coaching in March 2022!
“Before working with Sofia, I wasn’t feeling confident about my worthiness to charge people for Reiki sessions with me, and was also concerned that my art work wasn’t good enough to sell, and that in order to sell it, I would need to price it really low.
I have come up with a name for my business and now have a website. I feel much more confident in my ability to sell my healing art services and paintings, and to charge a reasonable price for both rather than sell myself short. I’m very excited about my new venture and have a new, much more positive outlook on it.
I have also realized, thanks to you, Sofia, that my story is very important and needs to be a part of what I do, and that this will help people to appreciate my work more fully. You are very good at helping someone determine their strengths and talents, and you creatively hone in on practical ways to utilize these abilities.
I would stress that you are very easy going and have really positive energy, and that you truly enjoy helping others in this way.”
~ Kim Lavinder, Artist and Energy Healer, Bluewavecottage.com Annapolis, MD
Have you ever forgotten the real thing that you are passionate about–
especially when it comes time to sharing it with other people?
I call it showing up half way and I see writers, creators, artists and entrepreneurs do it all the time.
For example:
Years ago I was complaining to a friend about my business. It wasn’t working, I said. I am doing all the right things.
“What happened to your business offers?” She said. “I don’t see you talking about what you can actually do for people, like all the creative support you say you want to do.”
Damn. Seen.
I tried to remember what I had shared recently like that…was not much.
She was right.
I wrote and created and show up consistently online. I could educate, inspire, entertain.
But I was not very salesy, to my own detriment I didn’t actually say how people could hire me to make progress for their book or business.
I know that a lot of people have feelings about people being salesy,
but for a writer, creator, & healer like me–
This is how I pay my bills. This is how I have a job that uses my genius.
If I don’t sell my skills, that’s basically like me deciding I deserve to be homeless and powerless despite everything good I have been given.
A lot of artists need financial support to keep going and hate the money factor.
But at the end of the day business is just about creating win-win opportunities to get paid and give your gift. The end.
It’s freaking magic actually.
But in that season, I was afraid of ruffling feathers in a big way, or that people wouldn’t like me so I stepped off the business gas…I “forgot”.
I stopped sharing the thing that would make the biggest difference to share.
Which means I was the reason I wasn’t getting many new clients!!!
I shared things online and felt like I did stuff but business-wise it was only half way there.
I had released being strategic about sharing my work and inviting people in.
And most of all, I wasn’t truly offering the deepest, most profound, amazing level of my SOUL work…
I was only scratching the surface of the service I could really give to the world by following my heart fully.
It is like going to party to announce something big and getting all the attention but kicking that announcement under the table, unseen and unfelt.
Do you relate? I see creators do this all the time!!
Dance around it. Talk about anything else but that thing that would move the needle on your selfish desires:
-The thing that would earn you money.
-The book you really love writing.
-The talent and gift you have.
YOUR REAL GIFT.
And you are the one that really misses out but other people will, too.
I just get this spider-sense and I know a lot of people miss the mark on what they really are here to do, even if other people can’t tell.
There are a hundred ways and a hundred days to do this.
-forget to mention your website or a way to connect more
-don’t call someone to follow up
-spend no time sharing and all the time creating.
These days, I always try to show up in those places I know I have been lacking–
even paying attention to what other people see that I don’t.
Cuz I am all about following my intuition but we all have blindsides mmk?
So I HEARD my friend. And thus, my new leaf is all about letting everyone know that:
I am a mermaid-at-heart badass who can help you make progress writing, creating or marketing for your book, creative work, and business.
AND if you can relate to anything I shared, the good news is that…
I’m giving away 2 FREE Creative Discovery Calls to help you shine in your zone of genius and make waves, living the good life:
-reconnect to what truly matters to you as a writer, creator or entrepreneur (the gift, the spark, the vision, the inspiration)
-explore the problems holding you back from advancing your creative work, doing it, sharing it, selling it
-discuss your next steps so you can shine fully as a creator, finish projects, make more sales and getting more beach time…
“I came to Sofia’s free Creative Soul Clarity Session because I lacked the confidence to bring my ideas to fruition. I basically felt stuck and lacking self worth.
Sofia was amazing. She is so kind and simply willing to help in any way. She helped me to get a schedule down and basically knock down every obstacle that I built for myself. She helped me to simplify. She gave me confidence and direction.
After working with Sofia, I have began my rough draft and am moving in a positive direction. I know that I can do it and I am doing it.
If you are hesitant about hiring Sofia, hire her anyway. She has such a spiritual connection that she knows what you need. Her intuition is always spot on and she thrives on helping others. She is honest and very good at what she does.
It’s been a long 6 months since the summer when my dad died, I can definitely agree with this quote I found on my @yogitea bag just now.
Gotta drink that tea in the winter, ya’ll.
It is still winter in Madison, Wisconsin. Yesterday the snow melted off my balcony for the first time since Christmas, but then it snowed again last night. Now it is a really sunny, pretty day.
Back to the past 6 months.
I have cried through a million tissues, been angry, felt like exploding, and other a lot of nasty stuff.
Working my butt off on so many estate responsibilities. So much intense garbage.
Needless to say, I am happy that piece by piece my freaking sanity has been coming back to me lately.
My anxiety has reduced some days and I am seriously shocked because it has been just that prevalent.
Feeling the anxiety recede, I think, “Is this a change? Or is this just an off day?”
What has helped it all has been time, yeah, but also something else.
Just plain putting myself FIRST.
-I do not shrink from the world letting life happen to me.
-I speak up about my boundaries.
-I give myself room and grace because I love myself and I am on my side.
I am here to live. I will make use of the life I have. I will survive and I will thrive.
End of story.
I hope this inspires you if you are a sensitive person who could easily put yourself last.
We need you. Keep working to find the balance you need to shine.
P.S. Do you want to sell something you are passionate about?
If you want people to be excited to sign up for what you offer, I’m excited to offerYour Mermaid Treasure VIP!
It’s a 1:1 business coaching program with Done-with-you copywriting and marketing, so you get aligned, high-paying clients who pay you to be in your zone of genius.
$1250 off until March 1st.
Contact Me and get more people to treasure your gifts.
as you are creating something, learning something, trying it out, crafting it, making it great,
you might give it away or show it to people for free and that’s fine…
Then, as soon as you start thinking about selling the thing you love, things get so much harder.
Maybe:
you stop talking about that thing you are passionate about because you are waiting for some qualification to sell it.
you get discouraged because you share your passion and nothing happens: no sales, or very few.
Maybe you sit on the idea for your website for a year or more because you don’t know how to put yourself out there the right way to do this professionally.
Maybe you blow up with success but then immediately tank emotionally.
All you wanted to do was give the world your gifts and talents, maybe help some people or make them smile, and live the good life flopping on a beach.
Is that too much to ask?!
Well, I haven’t given up hope it is possible for you but I know it is not always a walk in the park getting there, especially doing it on your own.
>>For highly sensitive people, empaths, people with ADHD, the experience of being rejected, or having something flop is PAINFUL.<<
This can hold you back from selling from your passions.
And if you are doing work you don’t care that much about, it’s can be less painful, or at least a different kind of painful.
But what if what you are really here to do isn’t going to get done if you don’t find a way to move forward?
To overcome the fear of selling your stuff and all the crap that comes with it!
New video out! I’ll tell you about the 3 major areas I notice people struggling with fear when they are selling their stuff–
it can happen at the beginning,
during the process and
even after you have been successful.
I know because I lived it!
Doing a creative job that I care deeply about hasn’t been easy, but somehow I haven’t given up by now, and I don’t want you to either.
I’m going to be sharing more on this topic, too.
Lessons I’ve learned in my journey of 9 years in business selling all kinds of things–
They helped me sell my passions so I could travel and meet my fiance.
I’ve helped entrepreneurs and writers around the world sell their stuff as a professional marketing consultant and copywriter for hire.
By the way I’m super sensitive, trauma-ridden, “maybe I have ADHD I dunno”, kind of person.
So if you resonate with any of that, I hope you know that:
you can still make a career out of what you love, even if it hasn’t been easy so far.
Even if you get freaked out or stalled or overwhelmed
You can still hack this.
Are you a sensitive or multi-passionate entrepreneur, coach, writer, healer, teacher, or intuitive?
Do you want to sell something you are passionate about?
If you want people to be excited to sign up for what you offer, I’m excited to offer a new super-deep level of support:
Your Mermaid Treasure VIP!
It’s a private business coaching program with Done-with-you copywriting and marketing, so you get aligned, high-paying clients who pay you to be in your zone of genius.
This luxury experience will help you make sure other people around the world understand what you do and how valuable it is, so they say yes.
Because your beautiful gifts should be treasured!
Get deep one on one attention to improve your unique offer and marketing so it sells
Get more of your writing or marketing done because you don’t have to do it yourself.
Get support through the week as you run your business or write your book
What’s included?
-Biweekly one-on-one deep dives of 60-80 mins for 5 months ($2220 value)
-2 hours a month of me writing, editing and designing your marketing! For your book, blog, business, website, social media, email, videos, etc. ($2220 value)
-20 mins x 2 a week private voxer support to answer questions and support between sessions ($2000 value)
–BONUS: Free access to Psychic Mermaid Creatrix home study & group program to make faster progress by tapping into your inner mermaid, your creative genius ($777 value)
Total value included is $7217
I’m opening up 1 spot to start in March! And it’s on sale.
Get it now for only $3750
Get a $1250 discount for anyone who signs up by February 28th.
Payment plans available!
Contact me to get paid to be in your creative genius zone and help people as you’re living the good life.
Don’t give up on something that matters for you to share. You are not alone.
We are all out here trying to do difficult stuff and it might look easy on the outside.
But it isn’t always easy. It is ok if it is hard to show up or if you need to take a break.
Do what you need to do and come back to it when you can.
And sometimes you do have good stuff happen!
For example I have been making youtube videos for a long time.
I do not always get a lot of views but I still like creating and sharing on my YouTube channel.
One video I made in 2014 “the breakdown before the breakthrough” suddenly started blowing up.
For several months, tons of people are watching it and I keep getting new subscribers.
I’m reaching new people with my message and maybe some of those people will stick around so I can serve them in a bigger way.
That’s powerful!
Morale is: You never know when something will work out in a positive way.
So keep going!
YUP I’m still pursuing my dreams and trying to connect with people despite being sensitive to rejection.
I just keep trying!!
Get back up on that horse.
P.S. I’ll soon be opening up spots for Your Mermaid Treasure VIP to help entrepreneurs, writers and creators who want to stand out and do something unique or one of a kind. It will help them do what they are really passionate about and get paid well enough to live the good life.
Contact me if that’s you and be first on the list to know more. And if that’s not you, but you want to make better progress on your book, business or project, contact me anyway. I offer other things to fit different budgets.
