Hope you are having an amazing day.

I’m away on my hiatus but I want to make sure you are inspired to write!

Writing is such an amazing tool, I don’t know where I would be without it

​

This article is the first of a set of my “greatest hits” so to speak, or

important articles that I don’t think got a lot of air time when I wrote them.

​

I’d love for you to check in and assess how you are doing with the ESSENTIAL concept below.

See how they can apply to you and your writing now!

​

Absolutely essential things don’t stop being essential!

xo

———-

​

​

Is it your time to write?

You want to write for a book or business.

Your creativity has been pushed around in the past, but now

🏵️ you are ready to flourish like a beautiful flower. 🏵️

Now what?

What helps you do this?

The key is to ask:

What do you need to make writing for your book or business feel less difficult,

and instead

🌷more easy,

🌷more fun,

🌷more beautiful,

🌷more awe-inspiring,

🌷more magic?

And if you are scratching your head unsure of how to answer that question,

here’s a hint.

The keyword is YOU

What helps YOU…

You have to focus on you.

But hold on, let’s stop a moment.

Here’s the thing, writing is not just about writing.

If you want to be satisfied with your writing that you complete,

You have to focus on what you value first.

Yes, before you write and during the process.

If you want to write or create, remember this general underlying principle:

When you focus on different values,

you do different things, &

you end up getting different results.

I’m trying to break down something RATHER heady and important

into bite-sized chunks in this 3 part series on writing values.

Stay with me.

So what should you value as most important in your writing?

🌪️ Rather than waiting for someone else’s permission to bloom or for someone to say you are doing it right…

🌪️ Rather than only applying tried-and-true writing systems someone else has created as “the correct way”…

🌪️ Rather than beating yourself up for not having success the way someone else does or doing it differently…

Try this:

🌷 Listen to yourself more so you can flower from the inside-out

🌷 Honor the ultimate authority of your writing process that lives INSIDE of you

🌷Become curious of your writing process and treat it like an experiment that helps you learn day by day

There is no failing an experiment, there is only learning and iteration where you clarify best practices to try the next time.

You never stay down, you always get back up, eventually.

By listening to yourself:

Your heart.

Your soul.

Your calling.

Your inner muse.

Your inner mermaid.

Whatever you want to call it.

Prioritize your inner experience.

That little voice saying

“maybe I could…”

“this sounds fun…”

“I wonder how this could work…”

And stop telling yourself that you can never listen to that voice because you are busy doing things or writing the way that other people told you that you have to.

That is a huge shift in values.

What you value matters because it will guide your creative process from start to finish.

Valuing your own intuition first is the kind of thing you don’t always realize is important until you have a creative guide or mentor to give you permission.

I’m here to give you permission to listen in and be more yourself so you can write for your book, business or other project in a way that leaves you feeling the love from others and yourself.

No more unsatisfying hamster wheel of doom.

Shift your Values Exercise

Are you listening to yourself as a writer, entrepreneur or creator?

Are there areas where you can listen to yourself more?

Are there areas where you can listen to others more?

Why would you choose one over another in a certain area?

What are you not hearing that keeps coming back?

Try journaling on it for 5 minutes.

Afterward, reflect:

How can you tweak what you are doing in your writing to show you value yourself?

I promise that if you start listening IN, you’ll learn things that will make writing easier and feel better.

Shifting your values will change your writing AND your life!

Your values are individual to you.

You may not think about them on a daily basis, so it’s worth taking the time to ponder them every few months.

This article is the first in a series:

An invitation to explore your values and decide what matters in your writing process.

Keep an eye out for the next one…

P.S. If you like this article, you will probably enjoy the Winter Writing Group!

If you want more support and exercises to help you write by listening to YOURSELF, and

integrate creativity-nurturing values to help you write, and

heal the wounds created from red marks in your old English class…

So you can finally feel satisfaction from completing writing that matters

for your book, business or other soul-led writing project.

The Winter Writing Group is a 6-month writing group coaching program opening up November 16th.

Spots are limited so click the link to get first grab at the available openings!

🍁 How are you doing? The temperature here has plummeted and it’s been very rainy and cool. 🍁

​

This is my last email before I go on hiatus!

It feels bittersweet because I love writing these emails and connecting with you,

but I’m also looking forward to some time to detach from my usual schedule after a stressful summer.

​

Why stressful?

To be honest with you, things that have been going on for quite some time that I have not gone into detail about.

It has not felt safe to share.

​

As a writer, this is always a weird place for me to be in–

to have something sit on my heart but not be able to express it outside of my private journal.

​

There are many reasons for this–

and, of course, it is totally ok to not talk about things publically sometimes–

but at the core of who I am:

​

I am a person who talks about things.

I am a writer and, overall, I am pretty transparent.

​

Even if I choose not to talk about something, I intentionally live a life that I can stand being publically exposed.

I chose this as a college student when I was contemplating a life in politics and its turnoffs.

I wanted to be a diplomat, travel, and create world peace but…

​

I never wanted to be afraid of damaging news “coming out” about me.

​

There are people out there living double lives that would destroy everything if it came out.

They build a fragile house of cards and it all comes toppling down.

​

I didn’t want that but I also wanted to LIVE.

I didn’t want to avoid having adventures and mistakes out of fear of life- or career-ending judgment.

​

For many reasons, I decided to not go into politics.

A perk was that I didn’t have to worry about making scandalous headlines with my crazy, young-person antics.

Now I live a life where no one cares.

​

But I also decided to look deep within myself about my fears.

​

Part of this wasn’t about anyone else judging me. It was about me judging me.

​

I decided to work on accepting myself in all my forms, even if it is

• inconvenient or
• messy or
• emotional or
• full of mistakes.

​

I want to process anything that ever “comes out of me” with grace and integrity.

Day to day I try to live my life with grace, integrity and thoughtfulness, but I know I will make mistakes.

I know I will never please everyone or even fully meet my own high expectations.

​

All in all:

I really have very little to hide.

And I love sharing.

​

I can keep a secret to the grave, but that’s much easier if that secret belongs to someone else!

​

But this is a huge change from where I was as a teenager and parts of my 20s.

Through my 10+ years of emotional abuse, I didn’t talk a whole lot about it because it wasn’t validated.

I was constantly gaslighted.

​

However, I found an outlet in writing about my experience on a semi-private blog for safe readers.

I barely ever expressed it otherwise, but that one space did so much.

​

I didn’t share everything but I shared a little bit.

I didn’t share it with everyone but I shared it with the people I could trust.

​

Over time I realized that holding everything inside is very painful,

and sometimes the only way for me to heal is to uncork, and stop holding back.

And it allows me to connect to people who want to help.

​

Which is why now-a-days as a writer,

so many years and hours of therapy later,

I generally do that,

maybe not in the exact moment of a breakdown, but after its over, okay sure.

​

Sometimes sharing has been messy or embarrassing or cringeworthy,

but often it has resulted in connection, catharsis, and relief from anxiety or pain.

​

But for what I am grappling with and thinking about right now…

Today isn’t the day that I am going to open the floodgates.

LOL

​

Not all the way.

Although, here I am today just opening it a tiny crack…

to let you know that there is more to this story for another day.

​

Certain things are too complicated,

they involve other people,

or are disenfranchised and misunderstood types of experiences that need to be shared carefully, if at all.

​

As I said in a recent article for On Purpose Woman Magazine, “some stories need time to tell.”

​

You can read the article here (page 118) It’s called Overcoming Instant Gratification to Write Better Stories.

​

Today I want to share with you this video interview we did as a followup on the topic of releasing instant gratification in storytelling.

​

In this interview, I share more about

• taking time to tell stories and living life more slowly,
• how I learned to do this while living in Japan for over a year, and
• how that affects my writing, social media and online publishing these days.

​

I hope it encourages you to live life at your own pace,

and give yourself the space you need

for whatever stories need to breathe before they are ready to be told.

​

🍁 Hi! Today I’m sharing 3 facts about “Deep Coaching” for your writing.

If it interests you, email or message me to talk more about it by

Monday September 11th at 10 AM EST. 🍁

​

​

1. Who is deep coaching for?
   ​​
   ​Deep coaching is for people with these sorts of writing goals:
   ​
   I. Personal Track:
   ​​
   You want your writing to feel more fun and authentic, because it feels good, whether you aim to share it with others or not.
   ​
   You want to get into a flow, write, leave your hangups behind, and feel more genius.
   ​
   You want to feel more best friend vibes: from others and, yes, from yourself. When writing and always!
   ​
   ​
   ​II. Professional Track:
   ​​
   You want more fans, friends, or followers– The kind that GET you.
   ​
   You understand that making powerful connections with more people can assist you in your career as a writer or business owner.
   ​
   You want to develop and hone your writing so you can connect with more readers in a positive way via your website, content, emails, salespages, books, etc.
   ​
   ​
   ​
   ​
2. What is included?
   ​
   ​—6 months with 3 Private Check-ins per month​
   ​
   You can talk to me weekly about your writing goals, progress, or general feelings and thoughts. I’m here to support, suggest ideas and answer your questions. This is over text and audio notes 🙂
   ​
   ​Submit up to 6 pages of writing for (optional) weekly feedback, or 3 pages if you want line-by-line edits.
   ​
   $1500 value​
   ​
   ​
   —6 Months access to the Video Vault
   ​​
   40+ videos to help you write and create for your life, book or business
   ​
   $333 value
   ​
   ​
   ​—6 Months Live Group Coaching​
   ​
   Join the next 6 month Writing group starting in December 2023. See what the last round was like here.
   ​
   The theme for this winter’s session is Paths of Service​
   ​
   $470 value
   ​
   ​
   ​
   ​
3. What is going on this week only?
   ​
   ​
   This week is the only week to enroll into Deep Coaching before November 1st!
   ​
   Enrolling into this program is the only way to get writing support as a new client until November 1st!
   
   After September 11th 2023, all interested new clients will be placed on a waitlist.

​

Hit reply to let me know you are interested by September 11th at 10 AM EST and we can talk more about it.

​Or read more / see my portfolio here.​

​
Have a good weekend!

—

​
​“To anyone thinking of hiring Sofia: Trust your gut feeling when you read, see, and hear Sofia’s work. You won’t be disappointed, she has a lot of heart in her work.​
​
After working with you I have been able to write a little more fluently and frequently. I have also been able to speak up as soon as I feel I need to!”

​
~Jenn, Florida

​

​
“You’re in for a real treat by signing up to work with Sofia. I started working with her towards the end of 2014 when I was writing up my PhD and she helped me through some very dark times.

Because not only was I writing up my PhD but I had moved back home with my parents and was also writing a children’s fantasy book. Sofia has literally bought me back from the brink many times.

In particular I will never forget having a session with her after having just handing in my PhD. Sofia was so grounding, nurturing and compassionate at that time, just what I needed.”

~Dr Saloni Surah, MBBCh, BSc, DFSRH, MRCP, Dip GUM, reiki master

Hey! I liked Twilight. LOL

Happy fall!

🍁 I’m in the “it is September so it is fall” crew, even if we haven’t hit the equinox, yet.

Today is rainy and cool enough for 3/4 sleeves so I’m definitely feeling the fall vibes. 🍁

Hope you are enjoying the changes in the season.

​

Above is the meme that I can’t stop thinking about.

​

What were your obsessions from age 11-12?

​

At 11-12 my best friends were probably my biggest obsession,

followed by getting good grades and not being gossiped about,

pokemon, fantasy YA novels, spiritual nonfiction, and those reptiles stuffed with sand.

​

Two of my best friends moved away when I was 8, which was so sad.

When I got new friends I really vibed with between 11-12,

I latched on HARD. We are still friends to this day.

​

​

This meme sparks a new question for me:

Is best friend energy just an indelible part of me forever?

Maybe!

​

It’s funny because lately I have been thinking a lot about BEST FRIEND ENERGY,

and how maybe the purpose of writing is really to be a best friend to yourself.​

​

I wrote the post linked above in August.

It came out in a rush, spur of the moment

but I got a lot of good feedback that writing to be your best friend was

“WOW! Jaw dropping, never thought of that before” material.

​

Do you ever have ideas and ask yourself:

Was that idea a one-off, spur of the moment thing I’ll quickly leave behind

or is it part of a deeper theme for me?

​

I’ve been wondering.

​

Also, it’s been my goal this year to have a better relationship with myself,

since it is the foundation of everything else.

​

Now that it is the 9th month of the year,

I can definitely say that I’ve come a long way.

​

Writing has been one of the most powerful tools on this journey,

and using it to have a better relationship with myself is NOTHING new for me.

​

Although I have been more or less conscious of it at different times,

writing has been in my toolkit for over two decades.

​

But this year focusing intently on that relationship as more important than ANY other goal was very different.

​

I did another new thing as well:

I reflected on what my gifts were, and being a good friend was very clear to me.

And I started to think—what if I built on my gifts?

​

What if I brought my gift for being a friend into my relationship with myself?

​

At first it sounded just crazy.

Then it sounded too obvious (and I thought how stupid am I to not think of this earlier…)

But then I was like, “Ok, fine. We will try it.”

​

It’s been months along this ever-evolving journey of self-best-friend-manship,

but all of this is just to say that me sharing the post on the topic wasn’t REALLY just a spur of the moment idea.

​

It was the culmination of many hours and years and decades,

writing, seeking, editing, publishing,

trying different healing modalities to heal from childhood abuse and all the other horrors of life,

learning and getting certified in a million modalities, and a masters in spiritual care of others,

as well as ten years of coaching and mentoring others.

​

All for the purpose of being a part of something more beautiful and less confined or frozen than my past:

Something rich, abundant, nourished and nourishing,

that could end up resulting in a harvest.

​

The post was just a small part of the harvest.

​

Because the real harvest isn’t

• the writing that really resonates with people (that is wonderful but a bonus), or
• the things I do for my business (woohoo! I love making money in exchange for helping people but that’s a bonus)

​

The real harvest is every little moment when I think–

Wow look at how I feel, and how I feel about myself right now.

I am not sure I have ever related to myself the way I am relating to myself now.

And it feels really awesome.

​

It is not every second.

But there are more and more seconds.

And they tell me that I have definitely come a long way.

​

​

​

​

What is the ultimate point of writing?

What if it is to be a better best friend to yourself?

​

When you have more “best friend energy” around your writing,

and not so much criticism or anxiety…

you will FEEL the love from yourself on a much deeper level.

​

That’s also the best way to connect to people with your book or business.

​

I’m about to close my availability for all new clients until November 1st 2023!

​

But I have one spot open for “Deep Coaching” at 34% off starting immediately,

​

1:1 writing support for 6 months

no phone calls required,

extra good vibes included.

​

If you want to give yourself more best friend vibes, write and FEEL the LOVE:

​

First read more about the offering here, and then

shoot me an email so we can schedule a conversation to talk about if we are a good fit.

Please email by Monday September 11th 2023.

—

​
​“To anyone thinking of hiring Sofia: Trust your gut feeling when you read, see, and hear Sofia’s work. You won’t be disappointed, she has a lot of heart in her work.​
​
After working with you I have been able to write a little more fluently and frequently. I have also been able to speak up as soon as I feel I need to!”

​
~Jenn, Florida

​

​
“You’re in for a real treat by signing up to work with Sofia. I started working with her towards the end of 2014 when I was writing up my PhD and she helped me through some very dark times.

Because not only was I writing up my PhD but I had moved back home with my parents and was also writing a children’s fantasy book. Sofia has literally bought me back from the brink many times.

In particular I will never forget having a session with her after having just handing in my PhD. Sofia was so grounding, nurturing and compassionate at that time, just what I needed.”

~Dr Saloni Surah, MBBCh, BSc, DFSRH, MRCP, Dip GUM, reiki master

How you been?

In the past week, I have been a bit ill.

It started as headaches that went away for a few days, but then no, apparently they are back and I have a cold.

We are also wrapping up week 2 of the ​free Heartfelt Writing Challenge. ​

Even if you are not in the challenge, I think you’ll enjoy this writing pep talk I shared with all of the participants!

Enjoy.

Today’s PEP talk:

I’ve been writing and publishing online for over 20 years.

What I’ve learned from my process and from helping countless other writers with theirs….

is that it’s easy to be unsatisfied and harder to feel satisfied.

You have to be really clear on your priorities about what really matters to you,

otherwise, you can always pick apart a piece of writing and find fault with it.

You can also always pick apart yourself for not doing well enough.

To me the ultimate point of writing is to be your own best friend.

I know it sounds trite or whatever but what does a best friend do?

– Listen to you talk.

– Notice the patterns and emotions under your words.

– Point out things you didn’t include.

– Offer helpful suggestions based on what you shared.

You can have your time to talk about yourself, write about yourself and then look back as the listener.

– How am I really?

– What is really going on here?

– Now that I have vented what is my next step?

– How much is this something I will care about later on? Is any of this writing a keeper or is this complete?

Btw–

Whether you write by hand, on a computer, transcribe your audio or watch a video of yourself talking,

I count that all as writing ✍️

it just has to be encoded and recorded so you can revisit it objectively from another angle.

Please revisit your writing as a unicorn 🦄 best friend

(not a fake friend).

For more writing peptalks and resources, sign up for my free weekly newsletter here.

The FREE Heartfelt Writing Challenge starts today!

• Create a daily writing habit
• Unlock inspiration to write for your book or business
• Feel the LOVE of the friends, followers or clients you attract

You’ll get daily nonfiction writing prompts and access to a community of other writers.

Plus even more free resources to build a daily writing habit.

​
Come join us, it’s free.

​
We start today!

​

Remember: you do NOT have to do this perfectly.

It isn’t English class and you will not be graded!

Let’s have some fun writing together and sharing from the heart xo

​​
Click here to register for free!​

​

​Let August be August

Guess what, it’s my bday month!

I hope you are doing something fun as this month, as well.

​

Lately I’ve been juggling a lot:

doing interviews, teaching about writing, helping the nonprofit Her Future Foundation and trying to enjoy the warm weather. Still working on my vlog. Prepping a digital organization class.

​

And despite my reluctant feelings about joining a new social media platform,

I am addicted to Threads. My username is sofia.wren .

​

There’s a lot of friendly writers on there, so I’ve been checking it maybe a little too often.

​

Recently on the Threads app, people began posting their “August Goals.”

Initially, I was shocked and appalled.

​

This is August and you are posting a list of goals???!

What is wrong with you guys?

​

GO DO AUGUST RIGHT.

BY BEING LAZY.

​

Since it’s my birthday month and summer,

I typically don’t expect a ton to get done in August.

​

So my initial thought was, “No way am I participating in this trend.”

​

But the feeling didn’t last.

After seeing post after post from different authors,

I wanted to join in on the fun, too.

​

When you are in a community of people excited about something, it is easy to catch that excitement.

​

So I caved, here is a list of goals:

-Host a free 21 day Heart-Felt Writing Challenge starting August 9th

-Turn 36 and party!

-Go to a break room and smash things. Record it.

-Edit footage for my vlog

-Help Her Future Foundation with a grant proposal

-Work on transferring a family business into my name

-Go to the pool and enjoy summer.

​

Things can feel like a drag initially, but as soon as you add connection to the mix, it can be fun!

​

That’s why I wanted to host a Writing Challenge on August 9th.

It is the day after my birthday and I decided this on purpose.

​

I intend for it to be a fun way for me to play and connect with other people like you.

​

Personally writing from the heart helps you feel more love, and compassion.

Inner-listening and reflection helps you be happier and more present in your daily life.

​

Professionally you get the material for better quality writing and get OFF a content creation hamster wheel,

so you can promote yourself with enduring topics and meaningful themes.

​

There are so many benefits to heart-felt writing both personally and professionally.

​

I go into this in detail in this interview below! One of my best.

Enjoy

​

Loved this interview with Natalie Neckyfarow!

What is writing from the heart? Why should you care?

Learn about the personal and career benefits of writing in a heartfelt way and how to get started for free.

​

I explain it all in this conversation with Natalie.

​
​Natalie Neckyfarow is an Actress, Writer, and Embodiment Coach who helps creative women experience more balance, productivity and creativity in their day-to-day lives.

Her Joyful Action Coaching Method focuses on deepening the connection to our bodies, releasing stuck emotions and stress, shifting belief systems, and taking aligned action to achieve our biggest and wildest dreams.

​
​www.cultivatingempathycoaching.com​
​

​

​Watch & learn about writing from the heart​

​

​

​

​
Join us for the free 21 Day Heartfelt Writing Challenge :
​
​
💜 Create a daily writing habit
💜 Unlock inspiration to write for your book or business
💜 Know what to do next because you can hear yourself clearly
​
Make more progress by writing everyday in the FREE 21 day Heartfelt Writing Challenge.
​
We start August 9th 2023
​​
Click here to register and get the future updates!​

​

​

​
​

​

SPICE UP YOUR WRITING

with the Summer Special

Live zoom or phone writing support at a discount

For help writing or editing:

• blogs,
• emails,
• website bios,
• heartfelt stories,
• business content, &
• nonfiction books.

Sessions must be purchased by August 15th and used by August 31st

​Check out the discount​

​

As a business owner or creator do you feel like this is just one more place you have to produce content? Another source of distraction?

Mm yeah kind of feeling weird about it myself.

I made this spontaneous video with EFT Tapping video to help cut through the noise, chaos and FOMO and to help you navigate in whatever way is best for you.

I will admit, I have come to enjoy using threads–but for me any new social media activity is a really slippery slope as I tend towards addiction.

(My username is Sofia.wren there.)

But if I can use it a little tiny bit and use it for connection or to talk about things I love, like writing, then I guess it’s ok.

Watch here to join me in the battle to find a balance with the ever growing array of social media platforms!

Show and tell time

​

One of my summer projects is a personal vlog (video blog).

I made my first vlog a year ago on Life After Loss and have been playing with what will be in episode 2 ever since.

​

I never thought it would take me this long to make my second vlog, after the first one went so well.

Lots of positive comments. And it was healing for me.

But that’s just been the way it has been. Some stories take time to tell

​

Here’s a behind the scenes of what that process looks like.

​

The first stage of my process this time has been:

• Taking videos of beautiful places when I see them to include as footage.
• Writing the story I might tell in the video. I will use this to eventually record the voice over.
• Rewriting that story until it feels done or important to say in a lasting way.

​

I’ve been doing this ever since my first vlog came out.

​

Things are feeling a little bit more solid now, in terms of what story I want to put in the VLOG, so I’m in a new stage now.

​

Second stage:

Then I started picking out some music that I think will go well with the mood.

​

​

Third Stage

This time, I also have been writing a list of additional scenes that I want to film.

These scenes illustrate certain things I want to say.

I even arranged some of these ideas into a “Plot line” which is a visual representation of the emotional arch of the story.

I’m still working on the content, but here is a peak…

​

Here’s a clip of some writing that may make it into the vlog (we will see):

​

​

“My artform is my being me, which means I express sadness or pain sometimes. This is not a sign that I need advice, fixing or that I am not ok. This is me expressing a good feeling: a feeling that it is safe. I no longer have to contort or fix myself.

​

My emotions do not need to be perfect. I accept it all. I am safe expressing sadness or pain and I inspire others when I am open, because whatever I feel others are feeling it, too.

​

I share from self-love, conviction that I care, that I hear myself. I can let it go with my words because holding on or pretending like none of it existed, long story short, IS NOT FOR ME.

​

My words describe me but also the past me, too, because it turns me into someone new whenever I express.”

​

Stay tuned as I keep working on my second vlog.

It is not ready yet.

I will keep you posted how the rest of the process goes!

Make sure to get my email updates if you want to hear more

​