If you are in America– Happy Thanksgiving!
It’s a problematic holiday but the one thing I think most of us can agree on is that being grateful is a positive emotion.
I’m so grateful for you!!! Thanks for reading this email!
I thought this would be timely for those of you having a holiday…
Are you spending more time on your phone or social media? Does it leave you feeling bored or off?
You might want to try this trick I used to make sure I am really filling my tank with what I really need, not just consuming crap that does not really fulfill me.
In the journey to find balance in my life, my relationship to social media has been something I’ve given a lot of thought to. On the one hand, it helps me connect to worldwide friends, both people I’ve known for twenty years, and friends I never knew that I had.
(It can be good! See my article about how to use the internet for connection.)
But social media is not always good.
I noticed after I lost my father in 2021 that I was scrolling through social media and just feeling bad. I had to ask myself, “Is this helping me or hurting me?”
I decided to institute a new practice for a while called “microjournaling” which I heard about from a youtube video by Struthless talking about quitting social media in this video.
I did not want to quit social media or using my phone completely but definitely use it less and be happier, more present or more grounded.
What I did:
For a month, every time I picked up my phone to scroll, instead I wrote a sentence about how I felt in a notes application called Keep.
If you want to try it, you could do this anywhere you can keep a written or digital note.
What I learned:
I discovered often I felt sad and just wanted a distraction.
If I went on social media while sad, I could easily see something that would make me feel worse, or at the very least, it wasn’t really going to make me feel better. In this period of my life, distraction from my feelings isn’t going to help me process them.
So I decided that when I feel sad, I will refrain from going on social media. I decided to take a break for about a month and removed pressure to post for my business. I just let people know I needed a break for a while.
I kept up the practice of journaling when I wanted to go on social media.
And then something changed!!
After a while, in my microjournaling I noticed I suddenly wanted to go on social media for the purpose of creating and sharing. That was new, and it seemed fun and creative, which was positive for me, rather than a negative thing.
So I started experimenting with making videos and pictures to share my life in an authentic way just to connect with my people. That has felt really good.
That was a good lead in to the new personal vlog I created about the lessons from grieving my dad for a year. I’m so glad I created that, it was really meaningful.
Current Practices:
When I don’t have something to promote, I usually don’t post every day like I used to. Even then–I’m constantly releasing the pressure to use social media, and being more reflective and focused on my body and how I feel.
How I feel is the most important thing.
But I still love posting on social media! I’ve got a personal instagram, a writing for biz instagram, as well as facebook account. I’ve got a personal youtube channel, and a youtube channel about writing, marketing, & spiritual stuff, including a ton of “shorts” I’ve made this month.
(Feel free to connect with me–I definitely try to make what I share positive and worthwhile to help you write, value your ideas, share your gifts or be yourself first.)
I’m all over social media.
As long as it is making me HAPPY, it can stay.
Conclusion:
These days I am not as rigid about microjournaling and sometimes I find myself scrolling for 20 minutes and still feeling bored—but I will notice and be like, ok what’s going on here? What am I really wanting?
I don’t always know but stopping the scroll and doing something else usually helps me figure it out.
I’m figuring out how to balance everything along side you, but I thought I would share in case it helps you!
Next time you feel bored or off, try writing a sentence about how you feel, or asking yourself, “What am I really wanting or needing right now?”
It is okay to be with those feelings even if you don’t have all the answers quite yet. I trust you will get closer to those answers in the end by being more connected to yourself.
Enjoy your holiday if you have one!!
P.S. Let’s write for your blog, emails, posts, website, or book so you can serve more people in a bigger way–as of writing this on November 23rd we have only 3 spots left. WHEW!
The Winter Writing Group is a magical place for the mermaids-at-heart who want to write as a way to share their message and skills so they can magnetize soulmate followers and clients. It starts December 1st! Click below for details (FYI, this page reads best on a computer):
The 6 Month Winter Writing Group and here are my recent FAQS
