Wren’s Journal: Full Sensuality. Full Moon.

As we gear up to the new year,  let us think on what will juice up our 2013.

In previous journal posts I’ve mentioned some negative things I don’t intend to take with me–shame and limitations. Feel me? Cool.

So now I’m thinking about the opposite.

In general, I want flow. I want life to feel easy. I want to desire things and get them, and I don’t want anything to get in my way. 

And for this month, I am focusing on more physical matters than I usually do. 

Last night I watched “Life After Porn” on Netflix. The documentary interviews a handful of former performers in the porn industry to see where their lives have gone after quitting. 

Something really struck me. Pornography is a $ huge $ industry. People pay others to act out public fantasies. It’s a service. Not one everyone will offer, but it’s a service to others.

People (mostly guys) will pay a lot of money to enjoy these films in secret. But afterwards, the stars are thrown away like trash, and due to rampant judgement can lose the ability to have a career or a long-term love. Even though a huge number of people bought their movies.

By 2013 it’s time to embrace sexuality. Considering that it’s the reason humans still exist–we should probably stop punishing ourselves for liking it.

I’m not a big fan of porn, let me be honest. Nor fashion magazines. A beauty standard should not be based on vaguely humoid pictures that’ve been professionally diced, groomed and manipulated. 

So here’s a new way to look at it.

How about we are all born sexual, but it comes to be expressed in different ways as deemed appropriate for our station in life. It may be more comfortable to think of it as sensuality.

According to me, sensuality is the enjoyment of being in one’s body and the senses.

If you think women haven’t been sensual or sexual their whole lives, despite the possibility of shame or judgement, you are flipping blind.

Boy bands

Tiny tank tops and makeup

Ear piercing

Child beauty queens

Twilight sexual tension

Twilight => 50 Shades of Grey success

Claire’s

crushes

internet stalking

do you like me check box

the market share of romance

• Romance fiction was the largest share of the U.S. consumer market in 2011 at 14.3 percent. 

obsession with how we look

desires for a boyfriend

preoccupation with dating

high heels

girl drama (having gone to peaceful women’s college, I conclude, much of this is based on competition for mates.)

mothers obsessed with how their daughters look

wedding fantasies

baby crazy

the size of your wedding ring

Can you say hellllooo?

Women aren’t sexual because they are bad  girls. They are

sexual because they are human. Whether or not they are

having lots of awesome shameless sex or not is their choice. 

And for the love of — it’s really not a big deal.

So I’m choosing to have a sensual 2013.

Including but not exclusive to:

Bubble baths

massages

red toenail polish

something silk

wet pastel chalk

dark chocolate with cherries

super food smoothies

What else should be on the list?

Happy 2013 in advance!